Breakfast of Champions by Kurt Vonnegut

Author:Kurt Vonnegut
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub, azw3, pdf
Tags: Fiction - General, Kilgore (Fictitious character), Science Fiction, Satire, General, Literary, Mental Illness, Sexuality, Science fiction - Authorship, Humorous fiction, Authorship, Fiction, Trout
ISBN: 9780385334204
Publisher: DELL
Published: 1999-09-15T07:00:00+00:00

The purpose of it was to kill people by jazzing them with more electricity than their bodies could stand. Dwayne Hoover had seen it twice—once during a tour of the prison by members of the Chamber of Commerce years ago, and then again when it was actually used on a black human being he knew.

• • •

Dwayne tried to remember when the last execution took place at Shepherdstown. Executions had become unpopular. There were signs that they might become popular again. Dwayne and Francine tried to remember the most recent electrocution anywhere in the country which had stuck in their minds.

They remembered the double execution of a man and wife for treason. The couple had supposedly given secrets about how to make a hydrogen bomb to another country.

They remembered the double execution of a man and woman who were lovers. The man was good-looking and sexy, and he used to seduce ugly old women who had money, and then he and the woman he really loved would kill the women for their money. The woman he really loved was young, but she certainly wasn’t pretty in the conventional sense. She weighed two hundred and forty pounds.

Francine wondered out loud why a thin, good-looking young man would love a woman that heavy.

“It takes all kinds,” said Dwayne.

• • •

“You know what I keep thinking?” said Francine.

Dwayne snuffled.

“This would be a very good location for a Colonel Sanders Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise.”

Dwayne’s relaxed body contracted as though each muscle in it had been stung by a drop of lemon juice.

Here was the problem: Dwayne wanted Francine to love him for his body and soul, not for what his money could buy. He thought Francine was hinting that he should buy her a Colonel Sanders Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise, which was a scheme for selling fried chicken.

A chicken was a flightless bird which looked like this:

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